Okie-Dokie Polling Says:
by Don Nash
“Those that would surrender their freedoms are mostly pathetic and are deserving of the tyranny they welcome in ignorance. Government never returns that which it takes by subversion.â€?…me
The polling staff of Okie-Dokie Polling was sent hither and yon throughout these western United States and put the really pressing questions to regular Americans to see what they might have to say and think. Some rather surprising results have been surveyed and tallied and the numbers breakdown remarkably along non-party lines. Access was denied to the great State of Wyoming. Wyoming feels rather proprietary about Deadeye Dick Cheney and Wyomingites feel that America and those pesky anti-war types have treated Cheney and his daughters quite unfairly. Besides, the wind was blowing in Wyoming so darn hard that no one was able to even get in the place. Okie-Dokie Polling just put Wyoming down as “having no opinion one way or another.�
Fully 62% of all the Americans asked, felt that John Edwards had no business traveling to Israel to seek support for his upcoming run at the presidency. A surprising 57% of all those asked, feel that America should come first so what was Edwards doing?
59% of the Americans asked, felt that Arianna Huff ‘n’ Puff (Huffington) is a tad to snooty and she should never have blackballed Gen. Wesley Clark. An additional 53% of that 59% felt that Huff ‘n’ Puff should apologize to Gen. Clark and wondered aloud if Arianna had “ever� served in America’s military.
An amazing 73% of all those polled were less than impressed with Attorney General Alberto Gonzales. 81% of those polled were curious to know if Gonzales had ever read the U.S. Constitution let alone was capable of understanding what the document meant. 69% felt that Gonzales would be easier to impeach than say, George Bush and 75% of that 69% feel that after Gonzales is impeached, he deserves “a real good slap.�
An ultra-impressive 91% of those Americans surveyed feel that George Bush is out of his freaking mind and 74% of that same 91% want to know what in the hell Congress is going to about the President. An additional 72.3% of the respondents feel that Bush has no business sending more troops into Iraq and 86% of those polled can’t for the life of them figure out what America is doing in Iraq in the first place. 69% feel that the loss of life both American and Iraqi is unacceptable and a staggering 97% feel that the costs are excessive and wasteful.
Fully 58.7% of those surveyed “suspect� that Iraq Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki is probably one of the founding members of Hizbollah. 61% feel that al-Maliki is pretty tight with the Iranians and a surprising 72% think that Iran isn’t the problem. A follow up survey found that 67% of the respondents feel that Israel is the problem that needs to be dealt with and after dealing with Israel, all parties can probably sit down at some peace table and find solutions to all of the Middle East’s problems. A whooping 94% revealed that George Bush would never and probably should never be allowed to say squat about the Middle East. 81% of those polled stated that with Bush in the White House, continual war is inevitable and “genuine and equitable� peace for the Middle East would have to wait until Bush is long gone from power.
A surprising 68% felt that Hillary Clinton was a “power hungry charlatan� and that given a “decidedly fair� chance, would be “drubbed� in an election with just about anyone but John McCain. 91.8% of those surveyed feel that Barrack Obama is the man but, 94% of that 91.8% think that the Democrats are too stupid to wake up and smell the coffee. No pun intended. Okie-Dokie Polling figures a plus or minus of .73% in all verifiable polling numbers and all results are final.